Relax priest, he’s pretty chill

Since I was a kid, I was prone to…a certain condition.
That is…supernatural beings found it easy to possess me.
Ghosts, demons, spirits, aliens at some point…
All been here, done this or that, we talked.
They be cool though, none really wanted the end of the world.
One demon, when I was 14ish, wanted to bring the apocalypse, but Satan himself came to stop him?
And swapped places with him?
Well, ever since then, Satan’s been possessing me.
He’s really, really tired.
Like imagine, billions of years working in Hell.
That’s tough.
So, I often go out and relax with my friends, eat ice-cream, and watch comedies when he comes over…or in-over?
Hard to say.
But now, I was facing a bit of a problem.
Our new neighbour was a priest.
And seemingly, he was no ordinary priest, because he instantly saw that I was possessed.
Even though Satan never controls me, he just inhabits me.
And today, he insists in coming over to discuss with me.
Thankfully, my parents are working, so this will be just a one-to-one.
Well, two-to-one, since Luci is here with me.
And yes, I do call him “Luci”.
I prepared snacks, and tea, and lemonade.
And I waited.
At around three in the afternoon he came.
He politely knocked.
“Excuse me.”
He said, as he entered.
I led him to the living room.
“Please, I prepared some snacks and refreshments.
Tea?”
I said.
He obviously refused.
“Child, your soul is corrupted by evil.
I advise you seeking help from the Church, and I shall send for true blood exorcists from Vatican…
For I can see…feel it…this is no mere demon.”
He said, worry obvious on his face.
I shrugged.
“He’s Satan, Lucifer, not a mere demon that’s true.”
I said.
He paled.
“Child! Don’t say his name then! His power over you will just increase!”
He shouted.
“Nah, relax, priest, he’s pretty chill.
He mostly wants someone to talk to, and someone to read to him the comics that have him as character.
Not going to lie, the books aren’t that wrong, he is pretty prideful.”
I said, Luci just chuckling in my head.
He just shivered.
Poor priest.
He ran out so fast, I couldn’t even tell him it’s all okay, and we shall see each other on Sunday, since I often help out at the Church.
Luci also likes going to the church, so as I said.
He’s pretty chill.